Nature Review: Chickens

For thousands of years, domesticated chickens have fed us with their plump breasts, succulent thighs and nutritious beaks. They have entertained us with their blood-spurting antics after being beheaded. They have warmed our spirits by stuffing our upholstery with their feathers to keep our fat asses comfortable. Truly, they are a wondrous animal, worthy of our respect and admiration.

Well... no. Not really. How dumb do you have to be when a force of hairy monkeys you outnumber ten to one conquers your entire civilization, boils and eats your young, and then deep fries and tears you apart with it's vicious teeth just because it doesnt feel like eating broccoli? I mean seriously! You have sharp claws, sharp teeth, and the ability to jump and hover. Come on!